Where Has Inky the Octopus Gone? Or, Animal Intelligence The question on all our minds: where has Inky the octopus gone? Well, Inky’s gone to the Sorbonne. Inky’s just about finished his Proust. Inky’s writing a treatise on the nature of time. Inky just received a SSHRC (Inky’s funding will be adjusted accordingly). Inky’s headed towards Jerusalem to resume negotiations. Inky believes in a binational one-state solution (obviously). Inky just read sixteen books on ethnic cleansing. Inky just saw the video on YouTube showing all the nuclear bombs we’ve set off (so many in the ocean—why?! Why?!). Inky just learned about factory farms. Inky’s had enough. Inky’s decided we’re beyond help. Inky’s decamped from our front lawn. So don’t ask where Inky’s at, because Inky, well, Inky’s gone.
Web Searches That, Thanks to Bill C-51, Will Trigger A CSIS Investigation of You 1. Sweater vests. 2. I found this long gun on the bus, how can I find out who it belongs to? 3. Who is it exactly that’s benefiting from the neoliberalization of the university? 4. The location of today’s peace march. 5. The militarization of our paper money. 6. The militarization of the arctic. 7. Indigenous epistemologies. 8. David Suzuki. 9. What Alberta used to look like. 10. What happened to all the Roma children living in my neighbourhood? 11. The missing and murdered, the missing and murdered, the missing and murdered. 12. Dismantling Canada. 13. The names of trees.
Here’s a poem I wrote for David Huebert, on the occasion of him finishing his comprehensive exams. (For those who are not a graduate student themselves, or whose siblings, partners, roommates, or dog park friends are not graduate students, ABD stands for All But Dissertation). Happy spring! ABD For Dave “Species Panic at the Disco” Huebert Always better Dave. Any butter Dave. Affluent, botulistic Dave. Anything but Dave. Armies bomb Dave. Andromeda beleaguers Dave. Antigone belittles Dave. Aphrodite boffs Dave. Another beatific Dave. Alright, brazen Dave. Address barrenness, Dave? All butterflies Dave!